Do you believe in astrology, horoscope or whatever prediction of life? I don’t, though sometimes I peek at the horoscope section in magazines and newspapers for pure fun. But recently I have grown a special interest in knowing my future. It should purely be attributed to the fact that I’m now completely in a mess pertaining to a career choice which need to be finalised in few days. Oh God! I cannot believe that I’M making a career choice. How my tiny shoulders are going to bear the burden?
In Malaysian education system, the teachers are given a choice pertaining their posting. So one can choose the state which she or he wants to teach in and sometimes if you are lucky enough you’ll get what you want. Unbelievably, according to my lectures, my seniors have got their state of preference, so there is a rumour going around that there are chances for us to get the state we want. And paradoxically, that’s what have been niggling me though many seems relieved by the news. As a result, many of my friends are thinking of asking for a school nearer to their home. Well, I have nothing against teaching somewhere near my place though that limits the level of exposure one might get. And also, getting posted somewhere near my home hinders my cognitive as well as personal development. On the other side of the coin, if I were posted near my home, I don’t really have to worry about anything else apart from my job as my accommodation, food, and even financial is taken care of (what else are parents for?). My parents have tried pleading, scolding and even threatening to get me posted near home, and so far I have maintained the “No” though I know when I go back for my holidays in 5 days time, they will manage to brain wash me :p
Another reason I’m dreading posted somewhere near home, is that I want to work in rural areas. I want to teach the really illiterate students who are in need of teachers than anybody else. Before you go on thinking that I have taken ‘the noble job’ thingy seriously, let me assure I’m not such a person. Much to the disappointment of the Malaysian Education Ministry who has been sponsoring me for past 5 years, I’m not an overly-keyed-up-enthusiastic- dedicated teacher who wants to spread the light of literacy. I’m just a very amateurish teacher to be who is still pondering on the rightness of the decision which I took 5 years ago. Well, the real reason I’m hoping to be posted to a rural area is that I believe that students in urban areas are not really in need of teachers as they can afford having private tutors. And seldom I see, urban students who respect teachers as the sole knowledge transmitter. So basically, I don’t want to be standing in front of class where nobody bother to listen to me. What is the point of serving people who can’t or don’t want to appreciate you? That summarises well my focal point I guess.
At the same time, being posted somewhere in a rural area where phone coverage and internet connections visit once a blue moon is certainly not going to help my plan of furthering my studies to the postgraduate level. And I’ll do anything to get hold of Masters before I reach 27. So my friends as well as my parents have been influencing me to apply for urban areas using my education as an excuse. Rural area or furthering your studies? This is the choice I’m left with. So, now I’m desperately looking for some signs which can guide me through this difficult decision making phase.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Ghajini
I’m not calling this a review but just my humble view of the movie. To start with, I was never an Aamir khan fan as I have always ‘fancied’ Sharukh Khan but recently I have developed a liking toward Aamir khan as an actor who values talent and begs to be different from the mainstream cinema. In fact his Taare Zaamen Par had me in tears throughout the movie.
Well, Aamir was not the only reason why I wanted to watch Ghajini badly as Asin who was making her debut in Bollywood along with Murugadass and not to forget my favourite musician were the strong reason as well. And the other reason is of course own Tamil Ghajini which breezed some novelty in the tinsel town. So, since I couldn’t catch the movie the other day, determined to watch it, I brought my friend along. And before going for the movie, with my limited internet I managed to download Guzarish song and what a song! It gives you a feeling of walking in the rain (I enjoy that!). And up to this very moment, it has been the only song which I’m listening to. And such a terrific BGM by Rahman.
Ok, now about the movie. I loved the movie and was trying to hold my tears in certain scenes (yup, the Asin’s death scene, and the meeting before Aamir’s departure to the ‘village’). First and foremost, Aamir has done a terrific job as Sanjay, the tycoon as well as the bloodthirsty STM patient. In fact, his role as an aggressive avenger keeps us glued to the seat. His pain and agony is so transparent in his eyes, that they window his anger towards the people who snatched away his dreams and his future. To put it simpler, his eyes speak volumes of his pain. Aamir’s well toned body certainly adds to the strength of the movie as the very sight of him flexing his muscles jolts us. Yet, personally I felt Surya did a better justice to the business tycoon Sanjay compared to Aamir (may be the power of Surya’s smile and certain mannerisms). Still, Aamir was at his best.
And now it’s Asin…I think as usual she essayed her role very well and her dubbing was quite impressive. Nobody could have lived as Kalpana but her. Whenever she starts with “Actually I saw Sanjay in New Delhi airport for the first time… (I can’t remember the exact words) regarding her so-called first time meeting with Sanjay Singhania the whole theatre breaks into laughter. Well, so it’s official that she has got a red carpet welcome in bollywood and what’s a better debut than debuting with Aamir khan and having a role of substance?
If I have to pick ‘the best scene’ from the movie, it has to be the scene where Sanjay and kalpana meets before he ‘goes to the village to visit the ailing mother’. The quizzical look on Aamir’s face when she gives him the money and her reaction when she says ‘Caaaar…..car ..can buy another time’ are impeccable. And the background score which plays when he leaves to the airport clutching the money tightly, lost in the thoughts of her generosity and simplicity is simply superb.
So, Ghajini is another honest effort from Aamir and Murugadass who wore the mantle of directed has crafted the movie wonderfully. A movie which leaves you with a lump in the throat when you leave the theatre.
Well, Aamir was not the only reason why I wanted to watch Ghajini badly as Asin who was making her debut in Bollywood along with Murugadass and not to forget my favourite musician were the strong reason as well. And the other reason is of course own Tamil Ghajini which breezed some novelty in the tinsel town. So, since I couldn’t catch the movie the other day, determined to watch it, I brought my friend along. And before going for the movie, with my limited internet I managed to download Guzarish song and what a song! It gives you a feeling of walking in the rain (I enjoy that!). And up to this very moment, it has been the only song which I’m listening to. And such a terrific BGM by Rahman.
Ok, now about the movie. I loved the movie and was trying to hold my tears in certain scenes (yup, the Asin’s death scene, and the meeting before Aamir’s departure to the ‘village’). First and foremost, Aamir has done a terrific job as Sanjay, the tycoon as well as the bloodthirsty STM patient. In fact, his role as an aggressive avenger keeps us glued to the seat. His pain and agony is so transparent in his eyes, that they window his anger towards the people who snatched away his dreams and his future. To put it simpler, his eyes speak volumes of his pain. Aamir’s well toned body certainly adds to the strength of the movie as the very sight of him flexing his muscles jolts us. Yet, personally I felt Surya did a better justice to the business tycoon Sanjay compared to Aamir (may be the power of Surya’s smile and certain mannerisms). Still, Aamir was at his best.
And now it’s Asin…I think as usual she essayed her role very well and her dubbing was quite impressive. Nobody could have lived as Kalpana but her. Whenever she starts with “Actually I saw Sanjay in New Delhi airport for the first time… (I can’t remember the exact words) regarding her so-called first time meeting with Sanjay Singhania the whole theatre breaks into laughter. Well, so it’s official that she has got a red carpet welcome in bollywood and what’s a better debut than debuting with Aamir khan and having a role of substance?
If I have to pick ‘the best scene’ from the movie, it has to be the scene where Sanjay and kalpana meets before he ‘goes to the village to visit the ailing mother’. The quizzical look on Aamir’s face when she gives him the money and her reaction when she says ‘Caaaar…..car ..can buy another time’ are impeccable. And the background score which plays when he leaves to the airport clutching the money tightly, lost in the thoughts of her generosity and simplicity is simply superb.
So, Ghajini is another honest effort from Aamir and Murugadass who wore the mantle of directed has crafted the movie wonderfully. A movie which leaves you with a lump in the throat when you leave the theatre.
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Hell 2
My disappointment on the hostel was so obvious on my face that my parents were assuring me that in 1 year I can leave this place… Bloody 1 year!! As they bid farewell, I started cleaning my room since my roommates were coming after 2 days. Moping, dusting, unpacking, sweeping…drained my energy to the core and I retire early cursing my hostel management. I can share room with people but sharing room with termites and worms…ewww! Nowadays, I take really short baths because, worms starts climbing in if you take bath for longer. May be that’s a strategy used by the admin to prevent us from ‘wasting’ water.
While hostel was unbearable, college was worse. I was not looking forward to the first day of college as my instinct was not positive. Though meeting all the friends after 2 years was indeed a good thing, the meeting place was not. Following the stupid college’s stupid protocol we had 3 days of orientation where all we had to do was sit still in the auditorium and pretend as though we are listening to the itsy-bitsy things they say. Staying overseas for 2 years has changed our thinking and our view and perspective have widened. However, the discipline board of the college is still in denial as they expect us to follow their silly orders without a second thought. Of all the ‘lectures’ I had during the orientation, one speech that I dreaded most and despised most was that of the head of the student affairs. I have never seen a big-headed person like him before. He was not fluent in English yet was struggling to speak in the language (though the others spoke in Malay) but thinks he is near-native speaker as he was proudly telling “I’m from English medium. I can speak English too” (very brave to embarrass himself in front of TESL students and also English lecturers). And he was keep on reiterating that he is not like the others, he is straight forward, open-minded (but you cannot do whatever you used to do overseas and follow our rules strictly, if you have long hair we’ll bring you to the shop and cut your hair(the last I heard such rule was when I was in secondary school!)) and one thing that was most obvious in his speech was ‘discipline’. And he was in midst of saying “I was brought up strictly and discipline is important wherever you are” and Kelly Clarkson started singing “because of you” from his pocket! And the whole hall burst into laughter. Here is a head who values discipline so much yet forgot to silent his mobile while lecturing 123 students! And poor man was so embarrassed by that incident and was startled for a moment. The next minute he regained composure, and said “ sorry I forgot to silent the phone…(long pause) I like this song by Kelly Clarkson very much. Because of you… (another long pause) ..That’s why I’m here. Because of You..because of you my dear students” LOL. I think that’s the best cover up I have ever seen!
And then there was another lecturer from the religious department who proposed few silly rules..no jeans in the campus, guys can’t wear wrist band or any accessories (what the….), girls cannot pierce nose, praying is compulsory (most ridiculous rule..what if someone is present physically in the religious premise but mentally elsewhere? Is this something that can be forced into someone’s live?). I have no idea what’s wrong with some people. Just because someone was in a country of different culture and beliefs, you cannot categorise them as spoilt people. People who want to lose identity and divert away can still do that when they are still here. All that matters is your self-control. A person who has no self control cannot be helped no matter where they are. And the so called senior lecturers and disciplinarians still need years to understand that I guess.
While hostel was unbearable, college was worse. I was not looking forward to the first day of college as my instinct was not positive. Though meeting all the friends after 2 years was indeed a good thing, the meeting place was not. Following the stupid college’s stupid protocol we had 3 days of orientation where all we had to do was sit still in the auditorium and pretend as though we are listening to the itsy-bitsy things they say. Staying overseas for 2 years has changed our thinking and our view and perspective have widened. However, the discipline board of the college is still in denial as they expect us to follow their silly orders without a second thought. Of all the ‘lectures’ I had during the orientation, one speech that I dreaded most and despised most was that of the head of the student affairs. I have never seen a big-headed person like him before. He was not fluent in English yet was struggling to speak in the language (though the others spoke in Malay) but thinks he is near-native speaker as he was proudly telling “I’m from English medium. I can speak English too” (very brave to embarrass himself in front of TESL students and also English lecturers). And he was keep on reiterating that he is not like the others, he is straight forward, open-minded (but you cannot do whatever you used to do overseas and follow our rules strictly, if you have long hair we’ll bring you to the shop and cut your hair(the last I heard such rule was when I was in secondary school!)) and one thing that was most obvious in his speech was ‘discipline’. And he was in midst of saying “I was brought up strictly and discipline is important wherever you are” and Kelly Clarkson started singing “because of you” from his pocket! And the whole hall burst into laughter. Here is a head who values discipline so much yet forgot to silent his mobile while lecturing 123 students! And poor man was so embarrassed by that incident and was startled for a moment. The next minute he regained composure, and said “ sorry I forgot to silent the phone…(long pause) I like this song by Kelly Clarkson very much. Because of you… (another long pause) ..That’s why I’m here. Because of You..because of you my dear students” LOL. I think that’s the best cover up I have ever seen!
And then there was another lecturer from the religious department who proposed few silly rules..no jeans in the campus, guys can’t wear wrist band or any accessories (what the….), girls cannot pierce nose, praying is compulsory (most ridiculous rule..what if someone is present physically in the religious premise but mentally elsewhere? Is this something that can be forced into someone’s live?). I have no idea what’s wrong with some people. Just because someone was in a country of different culture and beliefs, you cannot categorise them as spoilt people. People who want to lose identity and divert away can still do that when they are still here. All that matters is your self-control. A person who has no self control cannot be helped no matter where they are. And the so called senior lecturers and disciplinarians still need years to understand that I guess.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
Hell 1
Have seen hell on the earth? I’m in one right now. Well, before that I owe an explanation for my short sabbatical though it was not an intended one. Apart from the doomed internet connection, the year end squirted some distress to us as mum fell sick and an immediate operation was called for. Thank God everything went fine and while my mum was still rejoicing the domestic break ( mums hardly ever get holidays, don’t they?), I took over the domestic duties, and I should say that I’m a domestic goddess in the making. Usually my morning unveils after 8.30 am but since I was taking over my mum’s duties, I had to be awake by 7.30 am which was a mountainous task for me. Cooking, cleaning, nursing etc etc and by 10 pm I would have been drained and that’s it ..call it a day. Now I know why mum retires by 10pm and there was I, ridiculing her sleeping habit. Thank God mum recovered fast and I happily and wearily handed over the domestic throne.
And now I’m back in KL for my studies. This is my final year as a teacher trainee and as I was away in Sydney for past 2 years as a requirement of my course, coming back to the old collage for my final year is not easy. Those days, the first day of school had always been something that I look forward too. I’m a person who goes into deep slumber just at the wink of eyes but eve of the first day of school had always kept me away from sleep. I usually get excited at the thought of schooling, and will be checking out the time every hour. But this time around, on the eve of my college registration day, I had so many gigantic butterflies in my stomach and a big lump in my throat. The very thought of college scared me off because I knew I had to do a lot of adjusting and there are some people in the college administration whom I dread like nothing else in the world. Still, as I have already travelled three quarter of the road, I had to brace myself to complete the impending quarter thorny journey.
And my parents drove me to the college, and the moment I stepped into the hostel room, my whole world collapsed! In fact the room was on a collapsing stage too! I have never seen a room as dirty and as awful as that in my life before. Termites nest along the wall and ceiling, thick layer of dust on the windows which has said bye to sunlight long ago, sticky and broken parquet floor, stench of damp bed…HORRIBLE! HORRIFYING! TO Be Continued!!
And now I’m back in KL for my studies. This is my final year as a teacher trainee and as I was away in Sydney for past 2 years as a requirement of my course, coming back to the old collage for my final year is not easy. Those days, the first day of school had always been something that I look forward too. I’m a person who goes into deep slumber just at the wink of eyes but eve of the first day of school had always kept me away from sleep. I usually get excited at the thought of schooling, and will be checking out the time every hour. But this time around, on the eve of my college registration day, I had so many gigantic butterflies in my stomach and a big lump in my throat. The very thought of college scared me off because I knew I had to do a lot of adjusting and there are some people in the college administration whom I dread like nothing else in the world. Still, as I have already travelled three quarter of the road, I had to brace myself to complete the impending quarter thorny journey.
And my parents drove me to the college, and the moment I stepped into the hostel room, my whole world collapsed! In fact the room was on a collapsing stage too! I have never seen a room as dirty and as awful as that in my life before. Termites nest along the wall and ceiling, thick layer of dust on the windows which has said bye to sunlight long ago, sticky and broken parquet floor, stench of damp bed…HORRIBLE! HORRIFYING! TO Be Continued!!
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